I've been working on this book for quite some time now. It is a sequel to my first novel, VOYAGE TO CRUSOE. Below is chapter 1:
CHAPTER 1
Cliff
Demont glanced at his watch as he entered the Seafarer, a restaurant on Santa
Barbara’s Cabrillo Boulevard. It was just before five, and the place was filling
up, but he managed to get a table for two on the patio. From where he sat, he
had a good view of the rush-hour traffic crawling along the boulevard. He
watched a silver Camry pull to a stop in front of the restaurant. His wife,
Lena, emerged from the passenger side of the car. She paused to speak with the
driver, a blonde who had gotten out and come around to the curb. They laughed
together, hugged, and waved goodbye, then Lena’s eyes searched among the
patrons of the restaurant for her husband. Cliff rose from his seat and waved. She
smiled broadly when their eyes met, then hurried into the restaurant.
Petite
and athletic, with her dark hair cut in a chic collar-length bob, Lena was
forty, but people often said she looked thirty. She smiled again as she made
her way to Cliff’s table, carrying a small shopping bag. She gave him a quick
kiss and sat, glancing around the crowded patio.
“So,
how did it go with Kelly?” Cliff asked. Kelly was the driver of the Camry.
“Perfectly.
We went over everything on the list, but we didn’t really need to. She knows
the house and is a super gardener. We’re so fortunate to have a friend like her
to keep an eye on our home while we’re traveling.” Lena’s big brown eyes
glistened with excitement as she spoke. “And look, the flags came.” She drew a
small parcel from the shopping bag. “Mexico, Costa Rica, Panama, Ecuador, Peru,
and Chile. Plus a French flag for the Marquesas and Tahiti.” She put the parcel
back in the bag. “I also got this for you,” she said, handing him a thick
paperback.
“An
Explorer’s Guide to Chile.” Cliff took the book and read the title aloud. “Thanks,
but I thought you would be our guide.”
“Well,
I left Chile when I was twelve years old, and have only been back once. So that
book will be helpful for both of us.” She put it back in the shopping bag. “I’m
famished. Have you ordered?”
After
dinner, they walked along Cabrillo Boulevard toward the marina, crossing over
to the seaward side of the busy thoroughfare at State Street. Lena put her arm
through his as they walked and said, “It’s so exciting to think that we’re
finally leaving on our world cruise. Our dream is coming true.”
“We
could leave tonight if you want to.”
“Oh
no, I want to say goodbye to our friends.” She laughed. “At least the ones who
show up on the dock at dawn tomorrow.”
“Yeah,
some of them didn’t think we’d ever do it.” Cliff chuckled. “Can’t say I blame
them. We’ve been working on this for the last ten years.”
The
traffic noise faded as they headed toward the harbor. Ahead, the marina and the
pungent smell of the sea loomed in the darkness. Cliff tried to pick out the
mast of their boat among the dozens of sailboats under the marina lights across
the narrow channel, but it was impossible.
“I
never doubted for a moment that this day would come.” Lena said, giving his arm
a squeeze. “Our adventure begins tomorrow, and in a few days, we’ll be in
beautiful Mexico. I can’t wait!”
They
had gone only a few more steps when she stopped and put her hand to her
abdomen. “Ooh, I have a pain in my stomach. Maybe that grilled chicken didn’t
agree…Oh god!” She doubled over and Cliff had to grab her to keep her from
falling.
“What
is it? What hurts?” he asked as she collapsed. “Lena, LENA!” He eased her to
the ground. “Lena, what’s wrong?” he demanded.
Her
breathing shallow and her eyes glazed, Lena didn’t respond. Cliff gave her
shoulders a shake. Her head lolled to one side, but she only moaned as she lost
consciousness.
“Lena,
LENA!” Cliff shouted. He put two fingers on her wrist, feeling for a pulse, but
got nothing. He tried her carotid artery and got the same response.
“Must
be a heart attack!” he said aloud. He laid her on her back, cleared her throat
and began administering CPR. “Help!” he yelled, his eyes searching for someone,
anyone.
A
passerby approached. “I saw her fall,” he said. “I called 9-1-1, the paramedics
will be here soon. Is she dead?”
“NO!”
Cliff concentrated on the chest compressions. “Come on, Lena. Stay with me.
Lena. LENA!” He pumped and pumped, and then an ambulance drove up.
A
paramedic appeared with his medical kit. “What happened? Is she breathing?” He
pushed Cliff aside and checked her vital signs.
“I
don’t know, she just collapsed!” Cliff said, his own heart pounding in his
ears.
The
paramedic looked up at his partner. “She’s unconscious, no pulse, probable
heart attack. We gotta get her to the hospital right now!”
The
ride in the ambulance to Santa Barbara Cottage Hospital took less than ten
minutes. The medical staff whisked Lena into the intensive care unit and
shunted Cliff off to the waiting room. A dozen people in various states of
illness and injury slouched in chairs in the middle of the room while an angry
young man argued with a receptionist at the front desk. Cliff paced near the
back of the room until a doctor dressed in light green scrubs came through the
double doors and beckoned him.
“Mr.
Demont,” he said. “I’m Doctor Callahan. Please come with me.”
Cliff
followed him into a small office just off the waiting room. It was furnished
with a metal desk, a couple of chairs, and a nondescript framed landscape on
the wall.
“Please
sit down.” The doctor sat behind the desk.
“How
is she?” Cliff demanded, still standing. “Is she okay?”
“Please.”
Dr. Callahan said, motioning toward the chair.
“Doctor,
how is my wife?” Cliff sat on the edge of the chair.
“I’m
afraid I have bad news. Mrs. Demont was unconscious when she was admitted, her
blood pressure was extremely low and we could not find a pulse. We did
everything we could but were unable to revive her. She passed away at seven thirty.”
Callahan checked his watch. “About ten minutes ago.”
Cliff’s
eyes clouded and he struggled to breathe. “How? Why?”
“Mrs.
Demont experienced a ruptured aorta. Instead of her blood going through her
circulatory system as it normally would, it leaked into her chest cavity. She
essentially bled to death. It is a rare condition that occurs suddenly and is
almost always fatal. She may have had an undiagnosed aortic aneurysm that
burst, but it’s also possible that the aorta failed for some other reason.”
“How
can that be? An hour ago, she was perfectly healthy. We were just walking along
the sidewalk at the marina. She was happy, laughing, excited,” Cliff said,
recalling the moment she collapsed. “She couldn’t just suddenly die!” His voice
rose as he spoke.
Callahan
folded his hands on the desk. “Can you tell me what happened? You were at the
marina, walking. Did she say anything? Did she give any indication that she was
in pain?”
“Yeah,
she stopped and grabbed her chest. Then she doubled over and started to fall,
like she was losing consciousness. I thought she was having a heart attack, so
I started giving her CPR and yelled for someone to call the paramedics.”
“Was
she conscious? Did she say anything?”
“No.
She passed out. I was trying as hard as I could to revive her.”
“Performing
CPR?”
“Yes.”
“And
the paramedics took over when they got there?”
“Yeah,
they kind of pushed me aside. I don’t know everything they did, but I do know
they started an IV and said they had to get her to the hospital right away.”
Cliff was having trouble keeping his composure. His mouth was dry and his voice
cracked. “They put her in the ambulance and they were saying she had no pulse.”
“You
rode in the ambulance with them?” Callahan asked.
“Yeah,
they shot her up with something, but it didn’t seem to help.” Cliff gulped and
struggled with his emotions. “I was holding her hand, but it was limp. I was
afraid I was losing her.”
The
doctor sighed. “Well, in the heat of the moment, it’s hard to diagnose a ruptured
or dissected aorta. It can appear to be a heart attack or stroke, and people sometimes
perform CPR, which exacerbates the condition.”
“Are
you saying what I did made it worse for her?”
“I’m
saying that nothing you did or didn’t do would have made a difference. It is
rare that a patient survives a ruptured aorta.”
Cliff
pictured Lena’s aorta bursting, sending blood gushing into her chest cavity. It
was obvious that pressing on it would make it bleed more. “The chest
compressions only made the bleeding worse, right?”
“They
didn’t help. As I said, once the artery tears, or dissects, blood rushes
through the opening. The heart doesn’t know the artery is compromised, so it
keeps pumping.” He rose and came around the desk, giving Cliff a sympathetic
touch on the arm. “I am very sorry, Mr. Demont.”
Cliff
stared at the floor. “I just…I just…I didn’t get to say goodbye, to tell her I
love her.” He buried his face in his hands and sobbed. “I can’t believe she’s
dead.”
The
doctor touched his shoulder. “I’m so sorry,” he said. “A nurse will be here
soon. She’ll take you to Lena’s room and you can say goodbye to her. Is there
someone who can come and pick you up? Someone at home who can stay with you?”
“I’ll
be alright,” Cliff said, struggling not to sob again.
“Okay,
the nurse is here now.” The doctor stepped out of the room as the nurse
entered.
“Mr.
Demont, my name is Britta, I can take you to Lena’s room now. Do you feel well
enough to walk, or would you like a wheelchair?” The nurse was about fifty,
plump and kind-faced.
“I’ll
walk.”
She
escorted him down a long hallway to a room near the far end, her nursing shoes
squeaking as she walked. Pausing outside the door, she said, “There is a tray
with water and juice for you in the room. If you need anything, just push the
button on the wall. Stay as long as you wish. When you’re ready to leave, you
can go that way if you want.” She pointed to a door at the end of the hall with
an illuminated EXIT sign above it.
“Okay.”
He pushed the door open and took a hesitant step inside. Lena lay on a bed in
the center of the room, with her head on a pillow and a blanket pulled up to
her neck.
Cliff
stopped just inside the door. This can’t be real, he thought. She
looks asleep, not dead. Someone had combed her hair and placed her hands on
her chest under the blanket. She looked peaceful and calm, with perhaps a trace
of a smile on her full lips. He felt an urge to grab her by the shoulders and
wake her, hoping this was all some sort of horrible dream. He waited, but she
remained perfectly still. Slowly, the fact that she was really dead began to sink
in. The implications of her death began to weigh on him: The profound
loneliness that would soon engulf him. The love they shared that would live
only in him, one-sided, unrequited, and futile. The guilt, remorse, and sadness
that he was already beginning to feel. No matter how much he loved her, or
yearned for her, she was gone…Forever.
Tears
welled up in his eyes, rolled down his cheeks and plopped on the blanket that
covered her. He reached his hand out and touched a damp spot where a tear had
fallen. He noticed the hair on his thick fingers and the veins on the back of
his hand. Lifting both hands in front of his face, his mind flashed back to
those moments when Lena was lying on the ground at the marina with his big
hands frantically pumping on her chest, pumping the blood through the hole in
her aorta, stupidly hastening her death. He stared at his hands, overwhelmed by
guilt and revulsion, then lurched toward a trash can in the corner of the room
and vomited. When he could vomit no more, the heaves turned to sobs, and he
collapsed on the floor, crying.
He
didn’t know how long he’d been slumped in the corner of the room, but at some point,
he had no more tears left to shed. Sometime later, he was still sitting on the
floor, staring at nothing when the door opened and nurse Britta came in, a look
of concern on her face.
“Are
you okay, Mr. Demont? Can you get up?” She bent down and helped him to a chair.
“Yeah,
I’m okay,” he said, shaking her hand off his arm. “I’m fine.” He looked up at
her, thankful that the tears had dried from his cheeks.
The
nurse opened a bottle of water and handed it to him.
“Can
I be alone here a little longer?” he asked after taking a drink.
“Of
course. Are you sure you’re alright?”
Cliff
rose from the chair, rubbed his hand over his face, and took another drink of
water. “Yeah. I’m better now. I’ll push the button if I need anything, okay?”
She
left, closing the door softly behind her.
Realizing
the futility of trying to wish Lena back to life, Cliff leaned over and kissed
her forehead. “I’m sorry, so, so, sorry,” he whispered. “I didn’t mean to kill
you.” He turned and opened the door, stumbled down the hall, and into the
night.
*
The next month passed in a blur. How
he got through it, he didn’t know. But the funeral was over, Lena’s ashes had
been spread on the sea off Santa Barbara harbor, and the last eulogy had been
delivered. He suffered through it all with that horrible image of his hands on
her chest, pumping the life out of her, tormenting him until he could barely
speak. Now, a week after the funeral, he was alone in the house they had shared
for the last twelve years.
It was late morning and Cliff had
not mustered the energy to get out of bed. When he finally sat up, he realized
he had slept in his clothes. His tongue tasted like a doormat and his teeth
felt scummy in his mouth. He gazed vacantly at a glass and a half-empty bottle
of whiskey on the nightstand for a moment, then stumbled into the bathroom,
avoiding his reflection in the mirror, loathing the sight of himself. Fumbling
in the medicine cabinet, he found a bottle of aspirin.
In the kitchen, sunlight coming through
the window hurt his eyes and he slammed the plantation blinds shut, preferring
darkness. Drinking a glass of water
revived him while he waited for the aspirin to ease his headache. Today is
the day, he thought. Barefoot, he padded into his bedroom closet and
unlocked a small gun safe. There, wrapped in a soft cloth, was his pistol. He lifted
the Glock 17 and checked the chamber. It was clear. Cliff grabbed an empty
magazine and a full box of 9mm hollow points from the safe.
Back in the kitchen, he sat at the
table and opened the box of bullets, then froze at the sound of a car coming up
the gravel driveway. Go away, he thought, holding his breath. Go Away.
A few seconds later, someone started knocking on the front door and ringing the
doorbell.
“Mr. Demont…Cliff Demont! Are you
there, Mr. Demont?” The owner of the voice was unfamiliar to Cliff. He flinched
and held his breath when the knocking turned to pounding. He started breathing
again when the pounding stopped, hoping to hear a car door slam and the engine
start. Instead, he heard footsteps approaching outside and peeked through the
kitchen window blinds in time to see a deputy sheriff walk past.
A cop! What’s a cop doing here? Cliff
wondered as the knocking started again on the back door. He shoved the gun and
ammo into a drawer and went to the door. “Coming!” He opened it and was face to
face with the husky young deputy.
“Mr. Demont. How are you doing this
morning?” The officer’s suspicious eyes quickly took in Cliff’s rumpled
clothes, bare feet, and haggard face.
“I’m fine, officer. Is something
wrong?” Cliff straightened his shirt and blinked in the bright sunshine.
“We got a call from a Mr. Ray Phelps.
Do you know him?”
“Yes. He’s a friend. Is he okay?”
“He asked us to come by and do a
welfare check on you. Said he’s been trying to reach you for a week. Something
about a death in the family.”
“Oh…Uh, yes, I’m fine. He didn’t
have to do that.” Cliff ran his fingers through his unkempt hair.
“You don’t look so good, Mr. Demont.
Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. Would you like to
come inside and see for yourself?” Cliff pulled the door open wide. “Come on in
and look around. Everything is fine here.” He stole a glance at the drawer with
the gun, hoping it was closed all the way.
“Sure, lead the way.”
Cliff led the officer into the
kitchen, glad there were no dirty dishes in the sink. He led him through to the
living room. “Bathroom is down the hall, den is through there,” he pointed
toward to his left.
“Nice place.” The officer’s eyes
scanned the room. “Anybody else here?”
“No, just me. My bedroom is there,”
Cliff said, pointing.
The deputy looked through the
doorway at the unmade bed and the bottle on the nightstand.
“I was sleeping when you knocked.”
“Okay, Mr. Demont. Thanks for
showing me around.” The deputy took out a notepad. “I have to fill out a form.
You know, routine stuff. Spell your name for me, please.”
“D-E-M-O-N-T.”
“Age?”
“Fifty”
“Married?”
Cliff’s mind stumbled and his throat
tightened. “Uh…my wife passed away,” he stammered.
“Oh. Right. Sorry for your loss.”
The officer looked up from his pad. “Occupation?”
“Architect.” Cliff paused, gathering
himself. “Technically, I’m retired. Sold my business to my partner three months
ago.”
“I see.” The officer finished
writing and closed his pad. “Okay, Mr. Demont. Sorry to bother you. We never
know what we’re going to find when we get sent out for a welfare check, but it
looks like you’re doing okay.”
Cliff showed him to the front door.
“Yeah, I’m doing fine. Thanks for stopping by.”
Outside the door, the officer turned
around. “Call your friends and family. Let them know you’re alright.”
“Sure thing, officer. I’ll do that
right away.” Cliff gave him a brief wave and closed the door. His hands were
shaking as he turned the lock, and sweat had broken out on his temples. He
peered through the window until the patrol car disappeared down the driveway,
then made his way back to the kitchen and took the gun from the drawer. His
palms were sweaty and it felt slippery in his hand. He carefully laid it on the
table, then retrieved the open box of bullets and the magazine. The box slipped
from his trembling fingers and sent bullets clattering in all directions when
it hit the floor.
Cliff dropped to his knees,
feverishly trying to gather them up, shoving them back into the box as he went.
It seemed to take forever, but he collected them all, except one that rolled
under the stove. He strained his fingers trying to get to it, but it remained
just out of reach. Wait a minute, he thought. So what if there’s a
bullet under the stove? All I need is one. He rose and sat at the table,
taking a deep breath to calm himself. After a minute, the trembling eased a
bit. He took a bullet from the box and pressed it into the magazine. What if
it misfires? He pressed a second round into the magazine. One more for
good measure. He picked up a third bullet and paused. Last in the clip,
first in the chamber. This is the one that will do the job. He carefully
inserted it, then slid the magazine into the pistol. He hefted the loaded gun
in his hand, sighted down the barrel, then headed into his office, a few steps
down the hall from the kitchen.
One wall of the office was lined
with floor-to-ceiling bookshelves, the rest of the wall space was decorated
with photos and renderings of homes he had designed, plus a few photos of Pelagic,
his forty-five-foot sailboat, and several photos of Lena. His desk sat near a
large picture window that faced a babbling creek on the north side of the
property. The desk was clear, except for a manila envelope containing his will,
and a three-ring binder that held his living trust. Though he was checking out,
he wanted his departure to be orderly. He had considered leaving a note but
decided against it. What’s the point? he asked himself. I could write
an apology for killing her, but what good would that do? I guess I could
write something like “Sorry for the mess.” But would that be of any value to
anyone? Of course not. He looked around the room, his eyes coming to rest
on a framed photo of himself and Lena sitting together in the cockpit of their
sailboat. She was leaning into him, a hand on his thigh while his arm was casually
draped around her shoulders. Both were smiling at the camera. It had been taken
the day the boat was launched. It was one of the happiest days of his life. That’s
the memory I want to take with me. He took the photo out of the frame,
picked up the gun, and went out the back door of the house.
Midday sunlight filtered through the
tall oaks and cottonwoods on the two-acre property, and wildflowers were starting
to bloom on the banks of the creek. The place had been part of the vast
Hilliard Ranch until Cliff bought it from Alice Hilliard. Soon after the
purchase, he and Lena rebuilt the 1940’s vintage house in a style reminiscent
of Frank Lloyd Wright’s Cedar Rock house. Behind the house stood a horse barn
that Cliff and Lena used as a garage and workshop, but it retained the musty
atmosphere of the farm animals it once housed.
Cliff had already decided that was
where he would do it. Much easier to clean up after I’m gone, he told
himself. He was, if anything, a practical man. He paused outside the barn and
turned slowly around, breathing deeply, taking in the sights and sounds of
nature for the last time. His senses seemed to be supercharged, making the fresh
new leaves on the trees shine in luminous shades of green. The budding flowers
were brighter than he’d ever seen them, and the warm air was deliciously
freighted with the aromas of spring. His trembling hands steadied and the sweat
on his brow disappeared. He was at peace.
End
of Chapter 1.
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